It is no longer news that friendship nowadays is no longer a valuable commodity. It is a question of what can I get from you? That is the popular slogan of “friends with benefits”.

So on the fourth day of sallah, I was home feeling bored and decided to visit some friends I hadn’t seen for quite a long time. My intention was to just get out of the house and go chit chat with someone. So on getting to the first friends house whom the sole purpose of the outing was meant for her, I met her absent because I went unannounced just hopping to suprise her.

Then I decided to check on another friend whose house was just two houses away from the initial house I was visiting,  hmm on entering the compound, I saw her young son who confirmed to me she was home when I asked him. I proceeded to the living room since I was familiar with the house as par we were friends and met an old lady sitting on a sofa, I greeted the elderly woman who also assured me that my friend was home.

Eventually her 7 year old son was sent to go inform her of my presence, behold! When the boy emerge from the bedroom where he had gone to call his mum said to me “She said she is not feeling well and that she has taken drug so she is sleeping” so grandma asked him, did you tell her she had a visitor? The boy said yes I did,  wow! So I just got up picked my bag and head for the door, grandma was calling out for me I just told her to help me greet her and i left.

So when I reached home my kids were asking why I didn’t stay long and I narrated what happened so my eldest daughter was like, but Nma even when we were comfortable,  I’ve never seen or heard you turned down any one in the name of sleeping, I just smile and told her that was me but people differ.


Some few years back when the going was good so to say for some of us. Yes we were a group of some young women in their late thirties who came together to form a forum, we interact,  advice and give support to each other when ever the need arises.  We make financial contributions to support ourselves in our different businesses ranging from #200 to #500 thousand depending on your capability.

This meetings were usually held monthly where we meet according to who is the host, we eat assorted food, drinks and who ever is in business takes her goods to such gathering were members patronise. When you see the line up of flashy cars in a particular house just know the (peace sister) were having a meeting, you can call out for any one amongst to borrow money whenever you are in distress and your problem will be solved.

I remember when the two of us from the group went on hajj pilgrimage,  on return our friends brought cartons of maltina to each of us so we could use to entertain neighbours and we’ll wishers who will come to welcome us. That was how close we were then. Eye service you may say.


Well I can categorically state that, the centre could no longer hold and so things fell apart.  Not that we had a fight or something, but the change that we are in now, recession sets in making some of us not to drive flashy cars again and wade out notes like before.
I remember running into the same friend sometimes last year and she asked, Aunty Rasheeda where is your car that you are walking?  So being friends why should I hide things for her? So I vehimently told her the truth about how for almost a year then, I’ve not had a car.  So I guess that makes her feel she doesn’t need me again in her circle of friends,  cos I believe she might have seen me through her bedroom window when I was asking the little one if his mum was in.

 God is the giver of wealth, power and position, he takes his servant where ever and in whichever position he want to see him or her. But most at times human beings runaway from fellow humans simply because they are facing one challenge or the other, be it sickness or difficult situations should, but people should know that The same God that tested that fellow can also test you or anyone else. Be a believer #don’t be a friend with benefit#.